In a world divided by class, race, politics and religion, kind-hearted people are talking a lot about privilege. White privilege, male privilege, the obvious privilege bestowed by wealth, and so on it goes. When we see someone with privilege we don’t have, it’s easy to resent them. When someone points out our privilege, we bristle. 

As a straight white cisgender woman, I have a tiny bit of experience on both sides of this coin. And I think it’s time to talk about the difference between privilege and entitlement. 

Because privilege, by and large, isn’t something you choose. Privilege is something bestowed on you, frequently without any effort or accomplishment on your part. Privilege isn’t something you can just get rid of, most of the time, and it’s not something you should be vilified for. 

Entitlement, on the other hand, absolutely can and should be sussed out and burned at the stake. 

Privilege is being able to walk into a convenience store, buy your soda and leave without any suspicious glances. Entitlement is assuming that suspicious glances are always warranted where they are cast. 

Privilege is walking to your car at night without your keys between your fingers. Entitlement is assuming that those who do are being dramatic. 

Privilege is using a public bathroom without a second thought. Entitlement is proposing that people who don’t fit your gender ideals should just go at home. 

Privilege is getting a good job because you know someone who knows someone. Entitlement is assuming you are more qualified than the person who didn’t get the job. 

Privilege is going home every night. Entitlement is assuming that people are homeless because they just don’t care to put in the effort. 

Privilege is spending an hour at the gym every day and eating all organic homemade food. Entitlement is forgetting that not everyone has the time or resources  to do likewise. 

Privilege is being able to read and understand all the signs you encounter each day. Entitlement is believing you are smarter than those who can’t, whether because of language or learning barriers. 

Privilege is walking up the stairs into any building. Entitlement is complaining about the wheelchair ramp that took your parking space. 

Privilege is holding your spouse’s hand while you walk down the street. Entitlement is complaining when someone else gets the same privilege. 

Privilege isn’t something you can help. It’s bigger than you are, a product of the society you live in. 

Entitlement just makes you an asshole. 

Don’t be an asshole.